Addicts often experience low self-esteem, feel incompetent,
feel worthless, have inferiority, inability to use will, have delusions of
grandeur, have lots of anger, are always right, life is unfair, self-centered,
self-righteous, can be jealous, hypercritical, obnoxious, inconsiderate, feel
cheated, and expect to be put down, criticized, and rejected. Often time’s
addicts believe that disaster is inevitable and they can sabotage themselves.
Often times an addict may suffer from a mental
illness too. What may be normal to a person that is a non-mentally ill may
be viewed different for someone who is mentally ill. They have irrational
thinking and can often reject rational arguments. They also have a different
concept of time, they don't want a delay, and the concept of the future doesn't
apply. Since their thinking is distorted they take drugs to feel justified and
complete. Addicts are like people who get sunburned , they can be withdrawn,
clingy, possessive, provocative, don't often believe in God because they feel
they are God and experience omnipotence which is the feeling of having
unlimited power.
Denial, rationalization, and projection are the 3
most common traits seen among addicts. Denial is not lying necessarily because
lying is conscious while denial is unconscious or willful so often they don't
know they are doing it because of the irrational thinking. Rationalization
means they have good reasons instead of true reasons, divert attention from the
truth, and preserve the status quo which it's often why addicts don't think
they have a problem. Projection is placing the blame on someone else.
They can feel guilt and no shame. Guilt is what
they have done; shame is who they are which can lead to corrective action.
Guilt can be undone by making amends but amends can't change defective material
that they feel they are made of. This can be helped by support from counseling;
people who have had similar experiences, and people they care about. They can
feel futile to change, don't want to be powerless, must believe they are
adequate person, but can become a constructive person if they have they love
and support from their family. This will add color to their life.
The 3 C's for an Addict's Family
- You
didn't cause it
- You
cannot control it
- You cannot
cure it
